3 things I know to be true

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Here’s the first thing: I'm a monster.

When I was learning about distillation from Ann Harman in WA last summer, I was forever changed the day she gave us all magnifying glasses and tweezers and asked us to to outside and dissect a flower. Though I had been learning about and working with plants for years, I'd never had someone tell me to go and do this. 

When I peeled back the petals of a tiny lavender flower to reveal the stamen and pistil, it was like this small yet miraculous world unfolded in front of my eyes. I could see the various stages of a flower turning to seed on a single stalk.

Once Ann saw my enthusiasm, she gave me a more powerful magnifying glass to look through. I continued to look, mouth agape in wonder, as if I felt compelled to quite frankly, explode.

There’s something so incredibly intimate about looking at flowers up close. I know I’ve talked about talking to plants before, but this took me to a whole new level. 

I knew that when we had our Aromatherapy Practitioner Training class this past fall, I had to give them a similar experience. The day we did our distillation demonstration, I also had the students go out, find a plant, and check it out under various microscopes. 

One student became infused with a certain zest that was similar to my own. The next day, this student said to me, "You've created a monster."

I laughed and said, "That's exactly what I told Ann the day I diseccted my first flower!"

Yes! Mission accomplished. 

I was reflecting on all of this today and laughing at how that's the kind of monster I want to create. Both within the student and within myself. 

I've also been shifting my relationship to work, running my own multifacted business, and being honest and open through the ongoing discovery of who I am and what I can do to make positive change in the world. I realized recently that my struggle with a lot (or all) of this is self-created. I've created that monster, too. 

And though she is welcome, I'm also not going to let her stand in my way. 

So this is why I say that there are three things I know to be true:

  1. I've created a monster.

  2. That monster is me.

  3. It's up to me to kill her with kindness.

It's weird to say that I think the #1 thing I've got going right now is that I'm learning to be kinder to myself. I'm trying to find the fun in the work I choose to do, rather than do work to then get to have fun. I'm learning to be less serious. 

When you stop feeling like something is wrong, then you can feel all right.

Nothing is wrong. Everything is all right. 

These are the words of wisdom that I can chisel into a blog post. If you want to hear more of these kinds of things as I think about them, follow me on Instagram and subscribe to my email list.

I’ll send you my Body-Listening Cheat Sheet, so you can start to tune in to the wisdom of your body. Chances are, you both have some catching up to do.

Have you ever felt like you’ve created a monster—good, bad, or both? What do you do to keep yours tame enough so as to not stand in your way? Leave me a comment and tell me all about your monsters.