The Picture that Changed my Life
/"Can I take your picture?"
We were sitting on a bench on Riverwalk when a woman came up to us and asked this question.
It seemed such an odd thing; we must have showed surprise and hesitation on our face.
"Seriously, I'd like to take your picture. You see, I have a large family and every time we went on trips together we'd take group pictures but there'd always been one person that wouldn't be in the picture because they had to take it. So I don't have any pictures of my entire family. I've made it my mission to offer to take pictures of people for them."
We learned her name was Bernie and chatted for long enough to find her delightful. Kelly handed over her phone.
When Kelly put her arm around me for the first time, Bernie chimed in, "It's okay, my son has a boyfriend."
She thinks we're on a date, I thought.
I had met Kelly a month before when I began my Thai massage training. After two weekends workshops together, we learned we had quite a few things in common. Besides similar interests in holistic healing (she's a mental health counselor AND acupuncturist -- how would I not want to hang out with her and talk shop!?), she shared some other random similarities. We're both only children who played clarinet in marching band. Both have spent years (decades for her) studying jungian shadow work. Plus, she's one of most fun and silly people I know who can then go deep and dark in the inner corridors of the unconscious.
We decided to meet downtown on a Friday to hang out, as friends.
Or so I thought.
After Bernie left and we looked at the picture she took, we both marveled at how happy and cute we looked and laughed about how she thought we were together.
Until that moment, I hadn't thought about dating Kelly. I was recently divorced, she had became a widow the previous fall. Neither of us were looking for anything romantically, both assuming we'd be single for a long time and we're quite content with that.
But in the days that followed I recounted our time together, asking myself, "Was that a date?" I showed the picture to a few friends and they all said the same thing, "You look so cute and happy, are you sure this wasn't a date!?"
Several hangouts and one long, honest conversation later, we decided that there was something worth exploring between us.
Much to the surprise of us both, since then we've fallen in love. Perhaps it would have happened without this picture that Bernie took, but it definitely played an important role of our relationship's beginning.
What's great is you can see Bernie's shadow in the picture. I wish I could find her to tell her what this moment has meant for us.
All I can say is that if some random person asks to use your phone to take your picture, consider going on a leap of faith that they are an angel messenger sent to set you on your path. Bernie was one for us.
And if you haven't met Kelly yet, I hope you get the chance. She's one of the most incredible people I've ever had the pleasure of knowing and loving. I'm blessed that she feels the same about me.
Happy Last Day of Pride Month. May we celebrate love in all forms all year long.