Day 13: When Something Clicks

Yesterday I was driving and someone cut me off. Not really bad, but it was definitely my right of way and they went instead. As I continued on behind them I felt my mind starting to form the thought of being upset. I saw a bumper sticker on their car for the Christian radio station and I felt myself starting to "go there" with the thought. And then in the next moment - ZAP - I felt the judgement, still not fully formed, suddenly disappear from my consciousness. The whole instance happened in only a few seconds, and all I was left with was awe.

I'm usually having to backtrack negative thought patterns; meaning I will have them, then realize it, then reframe the whole thing.  This experience yesterday was a completely different process that I had never consciously witneseds before. It was like some new metal alignment took place.

All I can say is yoga is definitely working for me.

Day 12: Truthful Praise

Last night was another great open mic at Cafe Hey. This little open mic grew out of my desire to have a place where I could freely share my art and myself, and meet others who desire the same. It has turned into an ever-shifting community of people, that is creating positive change in the world more than I could have ever imagined. I have made many friends through the open mic, or had friends convert into open mic attendees and feel blessed that every week I get to go to a place where I'm loved, accepted, and even sometimes praised.

I will acknowledge that it is difficult for me to write the last word in the previous paragraph, but after last night I think I need to get over it.  In all the amazingness that was shared last night there were two moments in particular that pulled my heart-strings to tightly I thought they might snap.

The first was when one of our hosts and good friend of mine shared a poem named after me. It's not about me per se, but about his experience with an emotional release session with me.  He shared his experience with working with me as a therapist and how it helped him tremendously in his healing. I felt blessed to have a shout out like that.

But apparently he was not the only one who felt compelled to let the people know the good news that they can feel better and that I might be the one to help them.  We had a last minute sign up by another friend of mine who happened to be in that night.  He  also shared his experience with seeing me for treatment and the resulting disappearance of crippling migraines that plagued him his entire life. That's a big claim in itself. But then it went further. He also told a story of when he was in his darkest moment, and how out of all the friends he thought of, it was me, the thought of me, that helped to pull him out of despair. Wow. He said, "Nyssa is a light in this world and you all need to know it."

The tautness of my heart-strings reached a breaking point in that moment.  My heart didn't break, it broke open.

Day 11: Water Whenever

I have access to running water everyday and almost anywhere I go. This is such a privilege that I've always had and I often forget what an amazing gift this is. But not today. 

Water is in the top three things that we can't live without for very long. Now that I've been paying a little bit of attention, I use it for everything! Drinking, cooking, showering, brushing my teeth, washing clothes or dishes, washing hands, watering plants, washing cars, mopping...the list goes on. 

Water is the basis of where life came from, and what keeps it going. I'm going to make sure I treat mine right. 

Have you thanked your water today?

Day 10: An Abundance of Food

As I got it my car, leaving the grocery store, this thought struck me: I just walked into a building containing a vast variety of food and got to wander around leisurely deciding what I'd like to eat.  This is a task I do regularly, but rarely do I think of how incredible this scenario is, or would appear, to many others in the world.

Despite moments of "there's nothing to eat" when I'm feeling lazy or desiring to eat for taste instead of nutrition, there is always so much around for me to eat. In feeling daily gratitude, gratitude for the food that nourishes me throughout the day needs to be at the top of my list.

So today, this one goes out to all the food in my life. The good, the bad, and the yummy.

Day 9: More Yoga! More Yoga!

Yesterday I met with one of my yoga teachers privately and became again enraptured with yoga's techniques in the practice of living.  I'm so thankful to have been introduced to this teacher, to be led on this path, and to be continuing my way through it. There is challenges, often, but the payoff of peace and presence makes it well worth it.

Actively incorcorating more yoga into my life is continuing to seem like one of the best things I might do. Ever. That's a lot to be thankful for.

Day 8: A Man with a Green Thumb

After seeing the purple longbeans (lower right) that seemed to just sprout up in my boyfriend's front yard yesterday, it only seemed appropriate to acknowledge this gift. I am so thankful to have a boyfriend that knows about growing things!


I still remember how the first time he came over he had beans in his pockets and planted them along the fence in my yard. Some died, some survived, and some thrived. This is where I learned maybe the most important gardening technique: Just put something in the ground and see what happens.  I guess over time, you learn more what works or doesn't. As far as I can tell, that's what my boyfriend has done. Oh, and regularly collects manure and leaves. Can't forget about that.

I still think it's magical, he's says it's just variety and persistence. Somehow I feel both are true.

Day 7: Radiolab

I love radio. I might also say that I am thankful for radio period, but it's good to be specific. There are many shows I am thankful for, but there is one that I've been listening to lately.

Though my radio connoisseur friend would disagree, I am grateful Radiolab is around. It's a science show, but a hip version. Maybe like if Science Friday and Snap Judgement had a baby. Or something.

Anyways, it has two hosts and will usually cover a broad topic then include several segments on that theme, always with creative production. It's where I learned about the "coopertino effect" and how new words on 'thinking' actually produces new thinking, among many other amazing things. The show is both entertaining and thought-provoking, and for me seems to always brush the tip of the infinite. And I like that.

Don't take my word for it, check it out yourselves. LISTEN HERE.

Day 6: My Fur Friends

Today's gratitude goes out to my pups. They aren't really puppies, but sometimes have so much energy I confused them with young ones. Baylee, the cockapoo, has been with me since 2005. Gracie, black lab mix, came to live with us around 2010 and they've been best buds since. These little creatures help to keep me in the moment.  They are always ready for love and playtime.  Its amazing to me how they can read emotions. Just the other day I was sharing with my boyfriend something unpleasant about my day and Baylee's sympathetic response was immediate. He might not be able to understand what I say, but he knows what it means. When I wake up or come home, there are two excited little beings ready to greet me.  I know they are both excited to see me and also wondering when is the next time we are going to go outside. They remind me how important it is for us all to spend a little time everyday outdoors.

Day 5: Therapy for Me

I've learn how important it is to make sure that I am receiving regular massage sessions. Even still, there is a part of me that resists it sometimes.  Just like with yoga, the rational part of me thinks that "I could get so much done with that time." Somehow that part forgets that taking the time out for self-care IS getting a lot done.

This afternoon I had a session scheduled and leading up to the appointment I was resisting getting on the table. For those that don't know, SET sessions are not always the most enjoyable massages but are also the ones that make the most change. Sure enough we found some pretty uncomfortable spots that had me breathing heavy and even shed a few tears. And you know what? I feel better and have been more productive in the time since the session than I feel like I would have been if I worked the whole time.

Day 4: Reunions and New Friends

A few months ago I made an executive decision: I was going to see my friends Mark and Iris this summer, for real.  Mark and Iris were friends from my Religious Studies days at USF. I met them both in a class my first year. Iris sat in front of me; Mark was the TA.  Iris and I became fast friends and ended up living together a few years later after I moved out of my parents.  Her and Mark started dating soon after and he became a frequent visitor of our apartment. Our second year living together, Mark joined us.  What a happy home it was.  

These are some of my favorite people. Ever. Those fond memories of being in collage, still young and harmlessly reckless but mostly silly, for me are imprinted with memories of these folks. A few others, of course, but Mark and Iris were part of the inner circle. 

After our second year of living together, they both graduated, packed their bags and moved to Boulder, CO. Five years flew by and I was still repeating the same mantra: I'll come visit next summer. Finally a voice in my head said, "Enough!" and I promptly bought plane tickets before any voice of pseudo-reason could get a word in. What a great choice that was. I brought my boyfriend, who was lovingly accepted into the family. He even found a friend who got all his obscure Simpsons references (Mark) and for that I'm sure he's thankful too. 

The four of us after a hike in the Rockies