New Beginnings, New Endings

Many of us have a preference for beginnings. I know I do. It's the first of the month. I have a *new* resolution to write something everyday. I am excited about a new challenge and about the possibilities of what will emerge. But the real test is to see how I still feel about this venture in a week, month or year when it no longer becomes new and instead is just the way things are. 

It seems that not as many of us have a preference for endings. Some do, but I feel that many of my friends and colleagues also lament the "can't get myself to finish what I start" tendency. But there is something comforting about a bow on a package, the last page in a book, or a tidy room. 

The thing is that anything "finished" will suddenly become something new again. The unwrapping of the gift, the finding of a new book, or the living in the tidy room is what automatically follows. It's like breathing, one breath always leads to the next until the final exhalation which is hopefully many breaths away for most of us. 

So can I diffuse the excitement of new beginnings and the weight of finishing something simultaneously so I fully enjoy the totality of the process? 

Let's see.

Day 42: I Love Yous

My yoga teacher recommended I integrate my daily gratitude with my daily yoga practice. He said fill my heart with the gratitude I feel for your daily gratitude for the day, with each breath. So today I was about to begin my yoga practice and I hadn't yet decided on what I was going to post as my gratitude for the day. Then, just like that, the answer came.

My friend that I hadn't talked to in a while called, so I decided to answer it. We spent about 10 minutes catching up and he ended the call the same way he does every time we part; he said, "I love you."

Most often I've shared those words with my parents, when parting in person or on the phone, and also some family. I also share those words with my boyfriend and a few close friends. Only recently have I started to cherish it more and more each time.

It seems like more of my friends have initiated "I love you"s within the past few years. Maybe its that I'm older and have known more people longer, or we are all more mature and know that "I love you" doesn't = "I want to have sex with you," or I'm surrounding myself with more loving people. Maybe, shmaybe, I don't really care what it is, I just want to say I love it.

Recently I initiated "I love you" with someone I feel close with but had never spoke the words in person. It felt amazing. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED. <3